Friday, a day started calm quite and warm. It was 56 degrees when I gotout at 9:30AM. I thought wow what a day. I should get out early andtake a walk around the hotel. Well from that point the day deterioratedbrutally, first came the clouds, then the wind then a bit of rain, thenthe wind started to cool down. It cooled down so much, when I got outof the office at 5:30 it was snowing haha. Well I a chameleon if snowis what is given I will take it. I was dancing in the snow flakes tothe tune of the Elton John song “Sweat It Out”.
No panic for me only the weather panicked … I loved this day. Noissues popped up after yesterday evening chaos. I was thinking,thinking and thinking most of today. The reason…. Mmm the followingpoem. It started about couple of weeks back in mind as I thought ofwriting a funny poem depicting the events of my first trip from Indiato United States. But when thinking about a way to bring those eventsto a poem I wrote these “throw away lines” which made me a think a lotand brought back a lot of memories. So the down time I’ve had camealong with this poem. I know I need to finish this poem to get out ofthe bad feelings. Here is some information about the way I write. Ifirst start with a phrase or sometime it is just a word that connectsme to some event or idea from my life or someone else’s life I’ve heardor read which had a profound impression in my mind. Once I get the ideaI write something I call a rough draft. Which is a mechanical effort tofigure out what I should write. Then it is a play in my mind oremotions to get it all into my heart than in my brain. This is wherethings can go wrong with me personally. Many poems I throw away asemotionally they become a burden for me. Another thing that can gowrong is if I am writing about a girl usually there won’t be a girl infront of me. So from internet or magazines I select someone as kinda amodel. That will become another problem. I am not going say anything indetail about it. I did that while I started writing “Tess” well I amkinda still messed up with that.
This one came way close to be thrown out. Well by today afternoonI found an end that I thought this is worth the effort of two weeks ofthinking, thinking and thinking. It is a long weekend. I hope everyonehave one or another plan for this weekend. May it become the best foryou in the next three days. I love you all. Have fun.
I found this picture above from the public domain use it if you want to.
MyConfession
The warmth and mystery by a billion kept,
Countrymen(1) who boasts about uncouth sanctity,
When their women worst than the worst prostitute act,
Behind closed doors and dark alleys.
Then there were the men who themselves call,
Patriots and brave when where nothing but pawns,
In the battle of politicians and money mongrels.
In the hypocrisy of life fed up,
And from the verge of hatred saved myself,
But before I left the birth land, declared I,
“Oh’ no boundary drawn by men can bind me,
To a piece of land upon this Earth so vast.
Philosophy by stoned men upon leaves wrote,
Cannot teach me patriotism and bravery,
My bravery is in loving not murdering humans”.
“You should not leave your motherland” said many,
For which I replied in arrogance,
“No land can show the face of my mother,
No wind can sing the rhymes she sung,
No warmth of the air can replace warmth of those hands,
I will only add the word ‘mother’ to the name of my mom”.
Then came to the land of wonders unheard,
Where illusions out numbered reality,
And from my life I erased the word, morality,
Though it showed up in bright colors again and again,
With a smile I ran after every bit of pleasure on Earth.
Though once in a while like a teenage girl, I whine,
About losing love, money, job and becoming a vagabond,
Deep inside the corner of my mind a smile blossoms,
As I play the drama of life with the script I wrote,
Long time back when everything needed given,
Even before, I wished in my mind,
There was only misery from my life I missed,
So I needed to add that to complete my life.
Every misery that came upon me,
Had the dark ugly hands of mine played,
A deck of card upon my own choosing.
But now everyday in wonder I question,
Myself, why I missed to add?
Another pair of hands I can hold on to,
Another mind I can listen to,
Another heartbeat that can rhyme with mine?
May be that part of this comedy,
Is up to her to write and finish.
(1) I was born and brought up in India. A country with the population of nearly a billion.
LA! ATLEAST YOU HAVE SEEN SNOW…
-Emily
I like tha pic
Amazing poem. I finally found someone with talent, their are so many useless writers here. Thank you for writing this! You expressed many feelings that I’ve been feeling lately. I’m actually to young to completely comprehend most of the poem, but the poem expressed fears that I have, fear that if I don’t overcome will lead me into a pit of solitude. How can you rise against such fears of rejection and pain? Lately I’ve been thinking about what exactly I want to do with my life, and I do have a plan of what to do financially but as to what I truly want to devote my life to I have no idea. I hate the area I live in right now and can’t get over this feeling of being trap here. I’m completely surrounded by ignorant people who don’t seem to be interested in anything meaniful in life, just money and their next lay, you know the type. Their is something very important missing in my life and I’m not sure if these are just the feelings of a youngman desperate to progress in life or if there is something essential that I’m lacking. I try to find this in absolutly everything I encounter in life, books, movies, other people, animals around me, the sky, but mainly music is what satisfies my soul. But if I’m not listening to music I caught in deep thoughts where I fill so dismal and tired of everyday life. I thought I could fill this ever deepening hole with a soulmate, and the girlfriends I’ve had in the past have been great but I always found myself haveing to change my true character in order to relate to them. Put simply, my past relationships have never worked because our prorities were always different, I’m either to weird or the people I’ve come across are just to simple minded. I’m sorry, I wrote way to much. But you seemed so insightful from your poem, I thought you might be able to give me some advice. Thanx, anything would help.
Beautiful integration of words with photograph.
beautiful imagery in your piece and lovely picture
I am the opposite, I love my fatherland, it’s the only place that feels like home. Its not so much that I want to live their, its rough trying to make a living back home. Yet when they say the first 5 years of life are the most important they are correct. The foundation of me was set in those early years, hence if I live anywhere else I cant help but feel nostalgic. Thats just how it is.
I confess– I am grateful you didn’t throw this one out! Some wonderful images here: “no boundary drawn by men can bind me” “where illusions out numbered reality” Very nice, L.P. Happy Post-Birthday Weekend! (maybe I’m the first to wish you that?!!) HaHa– LahLah
Hello. Thanks for your kind thoughts. Also, this poem is very uplifting and just beautiful. This is my favorite part:
“Oh’ no boundary drawn by men can bind me,
To a piece of land upon this Earth so vast.
Philosophy by stoned men upon leaves wrote,
Cannot teach me patriotism and bravery,
My bravery is in loving not murdering humans”.
Wow! Awesome words and spirit in this one. Take care and wishing you a happy weekend 🙂