Month: February 2011

Looks like the browser at work screwed up… it just gave me the thought I am not blocked anymore. But the thought was beautiful. Thank you

Good bye cantankerous thoughts,

Good bye nightmares,

Unfriendly I am not,

Unfriendly you are not.

Even the silhouette of hope on an anchor tied and drowned.

Still, for the gesture of an opened door,

Though unclear, in kindness or in affection,

Former I will take not,

Latter I deserve or not, I know not,

Either way mind to gratitude succumbs,

And the setting sun makes rainbows out of filled up eyes.

Where do I start this post? I asked myself that question a thousand times today. I started a new phase of life yesterday. I should be more reasonable to myself in the matter of demands and I should be more responsible about everything I do from here on. Life shows one way, we choose another and end up walking a totally different way. It all comes in a package of positive, negative and of course things that neutrally passes through us all. It is easier to write about it than live it.  All those are glittering will lose their shine the moment you think what is seen is not shiny anymore. It is fascinating how people change their minds and that’s what I was thinking all day.

  When I started this day I thought I may end up writing a poem by the end of the day with the way thoughts travelled. But it is a déjà vu. I have lived this day. I have thought about the same way many times and I have written many poems in the same structure and theme again and again. I am tired.

  I wrote to someone with an open mind, I meant myself to be a better person, I meant myself to try to make another person understand me in a better way. I am not a sick person to feel a connection to another person at all. I am not a person who will just make up dreams and write about it (even though I claimed myself doing that many times). When certain events failed to be part of past and are with me and my everyday life, it makes no sense to impose upon life a self inflicted wound of waiting. However, when someone else is felt every moment of my life in every action I do, either I am full blown insane or I am very much in love with that person. The failure to judge that sanity, insanity issue is where I am right now.  I know it is hard in every way to talk to someone you don’t love and I truly understand the mentality of a person who don’t love you at all.

   In many ways I tried to string my words and write verses and bind it all into the feelings of mine. But I have said it all; I can only repeat all that was said. I have no more words of mine to say. All I can say is I would have spend every breath for you my inspiration, my darling, my love.

13 Years of Waiting is over The Lombardi trophy is coming back home… The Green Bay Packers are world champions… WOOOO I feel so lucky to be back in Wisconsin when this happened. I want to hug and kiss another Wisconsiner …. Yeah..

I am on the Road Now.. Watch me Thinking Out Loud

Here is the Poem in a video

Day is no day without light,
Bird is no bird without wings,
Music is meaningless to the deaf,
Art is nothing for the blind.

Cold means nothing without the warmth,
Body becomes a rotten corpse without the soul,
Present means nothing without the past,
And there is no future without the present.

Life without love, vastness of outer space,
Life without you near, unlivable,
When thinking about life without you,

A thousand thunders inside of mind explodes,
Crushing every hopes and dreams to oblivion,
Once more I ask,
How will I end this? Please help.

Let it snow, Let it snow.. wow beautiful snow. How am I going to get it all off my truck it is an half an hour job. I can see it through the window of my hotel room when I am drinking Hot Tea sweetened with honey and boiled oats mixed with minced banana. Obama, bail me out.. give me a million I will never mess with any computers just write good poetry that will inspire Americans to do a better job.

  Said that, this poem maybe inspiring or may not be. It was written out of sheer frustration of my failure to convince a girl to at least be a friend online. Well, you be the judge in how well it all came out or not.

Stay safe and drive with care. Make sure you are warm.

The Defined Sense.

 Life, Ah’ life, it started with a mind with emptiness filled,
Humble steps and harmless falls took mind ahead.
Cried,  when nothing more known or pain of fall felt,
Smiled, when before an unknown for attention stood.

Defined, one’s own destiny with actions filled,
Refined, those actions when in failures backfired.
Misunderstood whispers, Oh’ redefined theology,
Sacred texts, Ah’ misunderstood philosophy.

Unanswered questions, mind in twists and turns feared,
Unconquered mind, Ah’ a lonely man’s missed fate,
Awkward silence of an unloved lover,
Torture that shows no bodily harm.

Valued by paper money, accepted by mocking talents,
Adored by time torn beauty, vision by illusions blinded.
A love filled reality by the mocking world destroyed,
When light from soul taken away by dramatic rejections.
 
How well should I shout to tell O darling how loud I should shout?
And tell you how much I love you,
Unreal it may sound, Unreal in every eyes that defines you,
Oh’ in real, five senses without you, a melting furnace.

I know you don’t define me, I know you don’t love me,
But without you undefined my life all around scatter,
Without your love senses their feelings lost,
As all merged into one sense and defined, you can never love me at all.

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