Month: November 2012

It is a poem I wrote, that’s about it. I don’t know the right of this or the wrong of this. I don’t care why I wrote it as I felt really bad before I started writing it and felt bad all through the time when I wrote it and when I read it once after I wrote it, I felt as if I betrayed myself. I don’t know you be the judge.

 

A Walk From Past To Future.

The whispers of the mind so well spoke,
About the glow in her eyes I saw,
“Open the heart O’ flesh and blood, heart you open,
For in those smiles you don’t see,
A wish for a thousand kisses in secret kept,
Ah’ the glow in those eyes seek,
The touch of your love upon her lips again and again.”

Love hesitates not and all doors of my heart I once closed,
To open for her love from the depths of my heart thrived,
Then to my conscience in silence I asked,
“Don’t you remember the pain we took?
Don’t you remember the despair we felt?
Blood still stains the doors of heart closed,
In the lost battle for love when love so fairly given,
But unacknowledged and trashed unfairly,
Do we need another pain filled misadventure?”

Silence through my mind spread,
And into a chilling fear it evolved,
As closer and closer her eyes came,
Then to me as if she read my mind she spoke,
“A beauty in perfection grown,
Is a beauty felt deep inside.
Pain upon your face I see,
Doubts upon your face I see,
And an undeniable truth too, I see,
And that truth is like a full grown Lotus,
A beauty by mud and dirt perfected,
Ah’ all I feel is what past pain and doubts perfected,
The love of yours will you honor me with?”

With eyes glued to her eyes I stood,
With every bit of strength in me I tried,
To feel her soul but nothing inside I felt,
Then to her with a smile less face I spoke,
“Reader of my mind the beauty of everyman’s love,
The honor is mine to take if a wonderful liar I become,
Not from a wound the past pain comes,
And the pain and doubt are only material to my love,
As in spirit my love to another I conceded,
The moment a blessing to my life she became.”

Then not giving another eye around her I walked,
But from the depth of my heart I once more spoke,
“Past is past and present is you, future what will be,
Will you walk with me and run with me becoming,
The love of future filled with only your love?’

I walked away from her with gladness of the truth I told,
The pace gradually increased as the pain in me increased,
Then the pain from inside of me in a flash left,
Ah’ a soft hand in my right hand I felt,
A thought said to me to look behind,
To my conscience my mind said,
“Shut up for good, let us be the past,
Let her love inside of him speak from now on”.
Without looking back, holding her hand tight I walked.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved. 2012.

After the 53 lines long writing with a depressing mood I raided my fridge and started cooking. Well what came out was not that depressing. Orzo Pasta, Spinach and Carrot, some Salmon and a Tilapia. I fried the tilapia and cooked the rest and ate. I know it is not a good idea to eat with a depressing mood. But you know what.. I loved it.

 

I am bored at myself, then I saw a T.V commercial where a pretty girl says to a guy, ‘You are boring, boring, boring” I felt like all people who knows me yelling at me what that pretty girl said. Hey I am a poet, poets go through emotional hells like this every day. Still I felt, I am a boring guy. Then I tried to send some paper works to government and I cannot find some originals. Usually I shout the ‘F’ word 50 times a min when things like that happen. But this time I remembered a pretty face I hate to forget. Then I went online and chatted with a random girl and looking at her I wrote this poem trying my best for a ‘distraction’ like Dr.House does in one of his shows. In all honesty, I failed miserably.

 

A New Age Symphony.

Your smile so precious,
You charm so wonderful,
Every time you blink,
Music fills my heart.

Through every music note I hear,
The rhythm of my heart beating,
Oh’ I knew not my soul dissolved,
In the love of yours as music came.

Hold my heart in symphonies you compose,
Touch my soul with melodies unheard,
Compose a new symphony with our names,
Your tunes counterpointing the tunes of mine.

We will weave dreams none ever seen,
In the music from our hearts play,
Hold my hand and take me in flight,
Of the dreams we both forever will see. 

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2012.

There is a little story behind this poem. After a long drive back home then a long sleep on a dusty mattress really messed my sinus badly. With that pain I went out to buy some groceries and meds. Then I thought I will get a tea from Starbucks and walked in there. I saw this stunningly beautiful girl standing right in front of me..Honestly, my friends and family, I really looked at her, you know what I mean when I said, looked. Hehehe…. This girl is about six foot tall and every guy even walking across the street is drooling after seeing her. Some guys I believe were cursing their pretty wives too. I stood there and I can see the guy in the Starbucks is waiting for her to go to him and he is all set to make her whatever she wants. Suddenly she turned to the side to look at a set of cups sitting beside us and there she saw me. First she didn’t notice me at all. After all who is going to look at a guy who is 42 years old, bulky around the waist, short and haven’t shaven for 3 days with grey hair even popping out of my nose? She took the cup moved a bit and turned around and asked me “You a real poet?” contrary to even my own belief I took couple of steps back because this girl got the most weird Eastern European accent I’ve ever heard.

I frowned and took a look up and said “I published a book in 2006, I hope that makes me a real poet”. 

She smiled and asked “Why not write a poem about me? I will buy you coffee..”

I can see at least 4 guys around and maybe couple of lesbians too looking at me and from their looks I can tell what is in their minds “Write it lucky bastard or we are going to nail you to the cold bench outside.”

I am no easy jack ass to get and it is not easy for me to write a poem with a lot of people around. I took a deep breath and told her “I don’t write poetry for coffee, promise you will hold my hand when I write with the other hand and I will write.”  

My best guess was she is going to say no. But she told “Sure I hold your hand on my chest.”  Now I know I am in trouble, I bought my tea and she paid for it. She then took my hand and we both walked to the table where she sat right beside me and there were like six people around watching what I am about to write. I took my journal from the bag and wrote the following poem. By the time I finished, all the folks reading the poem applauded. Well that was the first time I wrote a poem in the presence of anyone else. When I walked out of that Starbucks I didn’t took a look back at that beauty because from a little kiss she gave me I know I gave her something she will remember forever and I don’t think there is anything more she can offer.

   One request she denied though, to take a picture of her and add it to the post. She is from Hungary, she will leave from O’hare tomorrow. Maybe after reaching her homeland she may change her mind and email me her picture, if so I will add it to this. I am not sure about it though.

 Here is the poem I wrote in exactly 12 minutes with a smile filled beauty holding my right hand when I wrote this poem with my left hand..

To A Smile Filled Beauty.

The fallen leaves of fall are gone,
The winds brought heavier cold,
Your face in my mind warmth filled,
So did the love of mine for you in my soul.

Through different paths of life you and I pass,
In different parts of world we live,
Yet, forever your smile I will remember,
Forever your smiles will beautify my life.

Like the golden chariots of the evening sun,
You eyes spread the charms of love,
In the light from those eyes reflects,
Filled are the new definitions of love mankind unheard,

All my passion, all my compassion for you I will give,
All my expression of happiness and love I will fill,
With prettiness upon your face I see,
And every bit of sadness in your prettiness will dissolve.

So smile Oh’ my dear in the celebration of life,
Smile to fill the world with charms of love,
Every prayer of mine makes me a better poet,
As every prayer for your love I dedicate.
 

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2012.